A mentor of mine once said, “I spend 85% of my day letting go.” Meaning, his days were filled with a series of attaching “to” something: an opinion on an issue, a desire to make a sale, finish a project, get the house cleaned, or simply eating a big piece of chocolate cake. And of course, it’s worse when we obsess over it — the desire magnifies.
On the flip side of the coin, there’s a desire to avoid something — or resist, like not getting yelled at by the boss, not pissing his wife off. The lists could go on forever.
Regardless, he knew his life’s problems were due to his “attachments.” His “constant attaching to” people, places, things and situations.
It’s similar to grasping a rose bush with thorns. As we desire the beauty and fragrance of the rose, we clutch onto the stem covered in thorns. We grasp it, hold it tightly, and don’t let go, even as the thorns pierce our skin, causing pain.
We do that in life, don’t we? We hold on tightly to things that cause pain — such as negative emotions, past hurts, and rigid expectations. Even though it hurts and blood begins to seep, we continue to clutch and cling.
The essence is that most of our pain and suffering isn’t as much about external circumstances as we think — but it’s how we engage with them. If we learn to appreciate the rose without clinging to it, we can enjoy its beauty without being hurt by its thorns.
So… if it’s only for a few minutes, let’s let go of those thorny stems.
Breathe, release and relax.
Here’s to a thorn-free day.
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